Amri's World

That thing !!!

2012-01-28T12:08:00.003+10:00

Yesterday I was testing a student and in this test she had to look at a picture and name the picture. I am also required to record her response verbatim.

One of the pictures she saw yesterday was this

Her response:(with a super serious look on her face)

" I am not sure of the name. Mom has it in her room and it makes her mad ! But I am not sure what it's called "

My response:( with a serious look on my face too... [I don't know how I managed that] )

"Great answer , let's move on "

I thought .............

2012-01-17T19:10:00.001+10:00

The other day as I was working with my favorite Grade 1 student, the white board easel which another teacher was using, on the other side of the room, crashed to the ground.

This is the conversation that followed

Student: Oh my goodness!! (While running to the other side of the room )

Me: Wait!! Stop!! Where are you supposed to be?

Student: But Ms. Thomas

Me: No!! Where are you supposed to be? What are you supposed to be doing ?

Student: Sitting at the desk and working…. But… When I heard the crash I thought. Can I tell you what I think ?

Me: Do you think this conversation is important right now? In the middle of the activity?

Student: Yes! Of course!

(Without waiting for my response)

Student: See, When that sound came, I thought that the board fell on Ms.A, then Ms. A fell on the chair, that the chair broke and Ms. A and the chair fell on the desk. As the chair fell on the desk, I thought I heard the floor break and I thought that Ms. A will be falling into the next classroom (my classroom is on the 1^st floor). So see Ms. Thomas, this is what I thought and when I thought that, I thought that I should go and see if there is a hole in the floor like I thought.

(After seeing my blank stare)

Student: Now, wasn’t that important?

A day to remember !

2012-01-11T14:38:00.001+10:00

Yesterday, I woke up earlier than usual. So that gave me time to nurse my sore throat with a hot cup of green tea and pray. As per my normal routine, I got dressed for work, picked up my lunch bag and stepped out the door.

I normally put my hand inside my handbag; touch my keys as I close the door. Yesterday I did the same thing. Well I THOUGHT I did. As I see the door close the reality of the situation hits me. The cold metal I felt in my hand bag, the cold metal I THOUGHT were my keys, were actually a pair of earrings. Did I forget to mention that by keys, I mean the key to my house, my car keys and my office keys! Since there wasn’t anything I could do about it at 7 am, I decided to take an auto to work.

Ever since I got my car, I have rarely used an auto so I had conveniently forgotten the art of haggling. I should have been suspicious but instead was surprised and proud of myself when the auto driver willingly reduced the quoted price of 150/- to a 100/- on my first demand. Later in the day however, when I proudly spoke about my regained haggling techniques did my colleague lovingly remind me that the normal charge is 50/-.

As I drank my way through 5 cups of green tea feverishly praying that the sore throat I had doesn’t escalate , I kept in touch with the security guard of my building and the maintenance manager and they assured me that in the evening they would arrange for someone to come and open the door. And true to their words after I had returned from work ( thanks to a colleague who decided that my haggling techniques weren’t that advanced and dropped me off ) , I was introduced to a gentlemen who was equipped with 3 things, a rope ladder, hammer and a chisel. He said he would be able to retrieve my key for 600/-. Keeping all that had transpired in the morning in mind, I very quickly said YES!

Even though the day I had was tiring and I wouldn’t want to repeat this any time soon, I went to bed super grateful.

Grateful that God provided me with an auto that got me to work on time.

Grateful that God provided me with a job that had facilities to allow me to drink umpteen cups of green tea

Grateful that God introduced to me to a wonderful colleague 2 years ago who would help me out by dropping me home

Grateful that there was someone around who would help me retrieve my keys

Grateful that in a situation that would normally have me panicking, He kept me calm and gave me an opportunity to be grateful.

At the end of the day:

"God's Grace is immeasurable; His mercy inexhaustible; His peace inexpressible."

New Year's Resolution

2012-01-09T15:42:00.002+10:00

I am not one for New Year's Resolution. This year however I decided to make and 1 and I really hope to follow through.

My resolution is to be more regular and consistent with my blog. Yeah it's a big ask... but you know what, I think it can be done. I have always loved writing and I think it's high time I got off my behind and do this....

So to all those who read or happen to just come by my blog..... stop by soon....

Happy New Year !

An Aunt !!

2011-05-24T15:40:00.001+10:00

I am going to be an Aunt... AGAIN.... and this time around

Wohoooo.....

I know I haven't blogged in a bit.... I really didn't feel like blogging.. but this... it just had to be told ..don't you agree....

More later....

The WOW factor !!

2011-03-23T19:38:00.004+10:00

A TURTLE or A SMART BOARD ?

Which of this holds the most WOW factor for you ??

Today a group of 1st graders walked into a classroom. In the classroom , directly opposite each other was an aquarium containing 2 turtles on a table and on the opposite wall was a smart board.

More than half the class went...'oh... is that a smart board !! '

PROOF !!!

2011-03-17T18:20:00.004+10:00

Here is PROOF that I am BLESSED with very interesting and wonderful friends ...

and yes..

those that blog hop would have definitely recognized one of them as the very famous and brilliant blogger Scatterbrain

My Niece Say's

2011-03-15T18:28:00.002+10:00

My Niece Says The most Adorable Things - 1

2011-03-11T14:31:00.003+10:00

My bubbalicious, adorable, beautiful, wonderful niece is 1 1/2 years old. So being the good 'speechie' aunt I took it upon myself to 'guide ' her to speak in sentences :D

So.. when ever she wants something , and I am around I have a routine and I make her repeat after me ... ' Tante (name of item she needs ) please ' and the adorable thing that she is does so using a mixture of words and signs !

A few days ago went to her mom and asked for water through signs. So Kavi, decided to follow the same routine that I do. She said , "Samaya say, Amma please " and Sam promptly replies " Tante please "

Friends :)

2011-02-18T17:23:00.010+10:00

I blog often about my life , my home , my family and my work. I just realized

that I have never blogged about those I work with.

I love my work even more because I have these amazing

people to work alongside.

As these pictures show we are a serious bunch !

Thank you guys for everything :)

A Testimony !

2011-02-17T14:52:00.003+10:00

I a very uncomfortable speaking / going up in front of people. I am more of a backstage person. So for a person like me this is the best medium of telling others.

Over the last weekend, at my church here in Chennai, we had a Super-natural conference. During the first night, our pastor called out those with back aches (which I suffer from quite frequently) to come forward for prayer. Remember I said that I am not a big fan of crowds...well I didn't go up then. The reason I gave myself was that at that point in time, my back

was not hurting (which in all honestly it was not!!). That night by the time I got home I could not sit. Even walking was impossible.

The next day, we were put into small groups for prayer. This time I asked for prayer for my back. And so those they prayed. Once the prayer was over, they asked me if I felt better. I didn’t and I assumed that well maybe soon and with more prayer!! (Silly me!!).

Soon after that it was lunch time and following that, I was in charge of KLUB (‘Sunday School’). It was during that time I realized that I had been walking around and lying on the floor / jumping up and down and through it all my back had not ached. Not even once J

I was amazed. I was thrilled!!

Wait...

This just gets better.

The same evening, our evening session began with worship which lasts for approximately 45 minutes. Once the worship was over I sat down and it suddenly dawned on me…. I had stood the entire time… the entire 45 minutes…. Wohoooo

Why am I ecstatic about it??

Well…. Here is why…

Ever since I came to Chennai and began going to Ashraya ( 3 years ago) , I have not been able to stand through a full worship set as sooner or later m back would hurt and I would be really uncomfortable. So I would have to sit down

This has been happening for 3 years!

So now do you see why I felt what I felt? After 3 years of being uncomfortable with standing, I finally got to do it without any problem !

And the icing on the cake….

The same thing happened on Sunday morning. A full worship set.. standing….

How blessed am I? How wonderful to feel his hand of healing.

You know, from the day I accepted Him, I knew he would work miracles in my life. I knew I was cared for. Sure there were times when it seemed far far away and almost impossible but even then deep down I knew I was taken care of and loved. But when this happened…. This just took my faith to a whole new level. Now I know there is more there. There is so much more that He can do. It’s just sky rocketed my faith.

I write this will full belief and faith that I will be able to stand through all the Sunday worships and much much more without my back causing me any trouble. And should it come again, it will be healed as quick!

Those that read my blog, I pray that you too feel Him work in your life and you too feel His presence and know that you are so much loved and cared for !

Need I say more :)

2011-02-15T21:11:00.002+10:00

??????????

2011-02-03T17:46:00.003+10:00

While I have things I want to write about....

I do not feel like writing ....

So then, the question remain...

To blog or not to blog....

Christmas Word Scramble

2010-12-17T16:37:00.001+10:00

Me: Since we are closing for Christmas break today, let’s do a word scramble ok. Remember ALL the words are related to the Christmas Story.

Student: Oh… that’s easy….

Me: Great... Let’s get started!

Me: This (YARM) is the name of Joseph’s wife. Joseph and ………..

Student: Juliet

Me: This (TSRA) is what we put on top of the tree…..Remember it’s scrambled

Student: Rats

Me: This (NAMGRE) is where Jesus was born.

Student: Manager

Me: Christmas story is about this (ESSJU) person’s birth

Student: Jessie

Me: Great... NEXT activity!!

Student: See..Told you it was easy Ms. Thomas. You did not believe me.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE !

Kids Say The Darnest Thing

2010-12-14T16:23:00.000+10:00

Conversation between my most favorite Grade 3 student and me

J : So Ms Thomas… Well you know.. you get me…

Me : I do?

J: Yeah you know what to do to get to me work.. and that works…

Me: That’s great right

J: Sure .. but I also know what to do to tick you off… I just pretend to be dumb… it works all the time. I wondered why you never picked up on it …

Me : Well silly me then huh… I shall be prepared next time… I will know you are pretending.

J: Well what if there is no next time?

Me: What do you mean?

J: Well what if I never pretend to be dumb anymore and just do all my work?

Me: Well that will be too difficult for me to handle.I think I would get ticked off seeing that…

J: Well in that case …. From now on…. I will do just that….

Me :Do what?

J : Ms Thomas… you are really really slow… I said from now on … I will never pretend to be dumb

anymore and just do all my work.. so that I can tick you off….

Me : Are you sure…

J : Most definitely…

Me : Okkkkkkkkk then....

The miracle in Room 2602

2010-10-07T18:00:00.000+10:00

(A conversation between a student whom I adore and me @ 8:30 in the morning)

Me: J , why are you not writing.

(All along he is sitting there staring right through me)

J: Oh! Ms Thomas… I have become blind.

Me: You have what?

J: Become blind. You know can’t see anything, can’t do anything.

Me: Oh ok. Well take 2 minutes and see if the blindness disappears.

J: Ok! Sure.

(After 2 minutes, during which time he sat still and continues to look straight ahead!! I admire the commitment!! )

Me: Has the blindness gone?

J: No!!

Me: Ok well then come. I have heard about this blindness and immediate action has to be taken. Surgery is the ONLY option. I need to take you to the nurse and the hospital and we need to get in there and remove the problem. Only then would the blindness would disappear.

( I proceed to take him by the arm and walk towards the door)

J: Oh... wait… wait… give me a minute.

J: Oh wow....it’s a miracle!!

Me: What?

J: I can see!! It’s a miracle.

Me: Yes indeed it is… definitely a miracle

The Water Slide

2010-07-03T01:55:00.000+10:00

It’s summer break for me. So my sister, my niece and I headed over to visit my folks. After boarding a train and a rickety flight we finally made it to Salalah. Out here since there is not much to do, my folks have membership at a hotel nearby so we get to use their pool, gym etc.

So the other day all 5 of us (Dad, Mom, Sis, Niece and I) headed down to the pool. This pool has a water slide and although it’s not very big, it’s pretty alright. My sister and I took turns at it and after much nagging and convincing my 6’2 dad decided to have a go.

We saw him climb and sit down so we waited.....

We saw a huge gush of water come and so we waited.....

And then.....

We saw 2 hands over the edge of the slide .....they were slowly moving along the edge....

And that’s when we realized it ...

Soon after dad had sat down, the water for the slide had got turned off. So the poor man had to slide himself down the slide.....

We hope to go there again this week.. let’s see what happens !!!

Kid's say the darnest thing.

2010-05-21T13:37:00.001+10:00

I have a Grade 2 kid in my class who is all things male. For him tennis rules, karate is amazing, plays ONLY fighting games on the Wii, draws only aliens and ninja’s, never uses the color pink in any of his coloring coz well “pink’s a girl color”, writes about tennis and how he defeats the evil person with his snake like moves, loudly proclaims that Hannah Montana is “ewwww”, is very happy to complain if he is asked to do anything out of the ordinary, and very happy to use “Oh! man, do I have to? “as a figure of speech.

So imagine my surprise when the other say I heard him exclaim, “oh sweet nibblets “.

ME (1) – EXHAUSITON (0):

2010-04-22T18:04:00.002+10:00

Ever since summer has visited Chennai, my so called busy life is tiring me out even more. Even though I spend all day in one or the other a/c classroom, by the end of it all I am tired. Yesterday I think I was sleep by 930... That’s how tired I am. Most of the time, along with physical exhaustion comes mental exhaustion. And that is something I always DREAD. Once the mental exhaustion sets in, it’s a never ending circle. It was a game and exhaustion ALWAYS won!! I know, I went through it last year. Everything makes a difference. Everything goes wrong and I seriously begin to wonder why.

This time however it’s a different tale.

Are things difficult? YES.

Are things going wrong? DEFINITELY.

Am I finding it difficult to cope? YES.

Are things working out the way my silly human SELF want it to (in short, will MY WILL be done)? NO

YET…. Despite this I am FINE.

I think the crucial moment in this so called saga I call is my life is when I realized that I got to stop relying on MY WILL and stop praying for it. There were (and still are) days I feel so broken and so lost and ready to give up and then I realize that these are the days I tried to do it all on my own. Pretty soon the realization that, it’s not MY WILL that should be of concern, but HIS, came into play. Let me just tell you all this. I was someone who had my life planned out when I was a teenager. So you can imagine the shock I was in for. It’s a great ask for a person like me to be told that this is something I don’t have control over. It’s a great ask to be told that “now is not the time “. It’s a great ask to be told to “wait”.

So now what?

I am listening as hard as I can. I am learning to let go and trust. I am praying for help in everything I do. I learning what faith is all about. I am learning to depend. I am learning to believe that things that are going difficult are soon going to get easy. Things that are going wrong, will soon find the right way and more importantly I will cope and be fine. I know, because it’s all part of HIS will.

I believe that there is a rhyme, reason and purpose for this part of my life. I can’t wait to find out what….. And that Ladies and Gentlemen is a whole different blog!!

:)

2010-04-21T19:50:00.007+10:00

On a day really fine

Of 2009

"you're going to be an aunt big sis"

silently whispered

my lil sis

Sure I was prepared

By doing most things right

I stitched a few dresses

And made sure she ate right (I think)

Calmed my brother in laws’ nerves

And deftly avoided “mood “mines

All this happened

In 2009

The day of Sept 17^th,

Threw us for a loop

Nothing went along

As it should

Saw my sis wheeled through

The theater doors

Spent minutes in agony

But knowing there was more

Out came a trolley

And in it covered in blue

Lay the baby girl

Making her debut

Eyes tight shut

Fast fast asleep

Oblivious to the stir

Or drama surrounding her

With a head full of hair

And “ don’t disturb” me glares

Our hearts were won over

Without a moment to spare

Soon she grew

And we all could see

What an amazing person

She was going to be

With smiles reserved

Only for us

And noises that resembled

A small rhinoceros

With a love for ragi

That tastes really gross

She hates carrots

Really !!!!

Who hates those???

Her eyes light up when she sees me

While my heart skips a beat

She has special smiles for each of us

I personally think mines really neat!!

Seeing her makes my day

So precious I found her to be

Her spirit and joy I cannot explain

It fills my heart none the same

I thank God each day

For the gift of you

Samaya Durai

I really love you !!

Of all the places .....

2010-04-16T17:35:00.005+10:00

Yesterday, I was at school and was walking towards the loo.

Suddenly I hear my name being called and I turn to find that one of my students is right behind me screaming “Hi! Ms. Thomasssss “. He turns and walks off into the boys’ loo (while waving to me all along ) and I walk into the teachers’ one.

To my luck, as I am leaving the loo, he comes out too.

Seeing me, he goes (quite loudly I might add) “WOW... Same time!!!! “

HAPPY B'DAY !!!

2010-03-19T19:43:00.005+10:00

When I first met her, she was 3 months old.

I had seen her before all wrapped up in a red bow and also heard her screaming like a banshee,

right then I knew that she would turn out to bea very interesting personality,

and thats exaclty what she has done.

with her strange yet wonderful sounds and fantastic attempts at imitating others,

this little girl has become a constant topic of discussion in our house

and won us over.

Today,

She turns ONE !!!

So.............

Happy Bday dearest baby gurl !!

GOD BLESS YOU !!

Love,

Tante

School Madness

2010-03-15T18:39:00.002+10:00

The other day, 2 of my students (P and L) and I were playing “Go- Fish”. We were playing Go-Fish with articulation cards (like most normal people do) that were for the /r/ blends (/br/, /tr/, /fr/, /gr/ etc)

After explaning the rule, we began playing. A few minutes into the game, While L and I were watching, P picks up the “grape “card and puts it into his pile.

Here is the conversation that followed.

L: ‘P, do you have grape.’

P (my really kind, truthful, wanting to win student): ‘NO’

Me: ‘P, you don’t have grape?’

P: ‘No, mis Thomas, I really don’t.’

Me: ‘P, are you sure you don’t have a card that has the picture of a grape? ‘

P: ‘Definitely not Ms. Thomas.’

Me: ‘But I definitely saw you pick up a card that had the picture of a fruit on it. Do you want to maybe double check for me and see what that card is?’

P: ‘Oh! Sure Ms. Thomas’ (and he proceeds to shuffle through the cards).

P:' Oh! Ms. Thomas, I do have a card but it’s that of a banana.'

(Please remember ... we were are playing GO-Fish with sound blend cards)

Me: 'Uhh… Hmm…. What card?'

P: 'Banana Ms. Thomas, Banana'

Me: 'Ok, P but you do realize that the word “Banana “does not have a blend right. Remember “blends” which we are working on.'

P: 'I KNOW …. Ms. Thomas, you are not listening right.. I said “brnana” NOT “banana”… see…”brnana” has a /br/.'

REALLY ???????????

Hmmmm I wonder why ....

2009-12-06T18:55:00.012+10:00

What causes grown, supposedly serious mature, adults to coo?

What makes them smile endlessly?

What makes then gurgle and blabber?

What makes normally” unwilling to move a bone in their body” grown ups jump up and down and do a jig?

What makes them make up silly rhymes?

What ends up being their main topic of discussion?

What succeeds in them dropping everything they do, to just stand still and stare?

What gives them the energy to act like clowns?

Why this of course .....

The look !!!

The smile !!!

The joy !!!

The love.....

PRICELESS !!!!!!!!!!!!

IF I WERE TO .....

2009-10-26T12:03:00.008+10:00

IF I were to write a blog to the car/bus/truck/rickshaw / cycle drivers of India I would say…

· There is a reason for the white lines on the road. It is not a decoration.

· When the traffic light turns red it doesn’t mean you increase your speed and play chicken with the other drivers.

· Honking the horn endlessly when the traffic light is red will not magically turn it green!!

· There is a cool new invention situated just behind your steering wheel… it’s on the left.... It’s called an indicator... USE IT!

· To the best of my knowledge none of us were born with horns attached to our hands, so it should not be something you repeatedly beep/ hoot/blare when you are stuck in a traffic jam.

· When there is a traffic jam the chances are that the car in front of you cannot move. Beeping/ blaring/ hooting your horn will not give the car in front of you wings nor you the ability to clear the jam.

· It really is ok if someone overtakes you. It does not in any way make you less of a human being.

· When you are turning left, it does not help if you are in the extreme right lane and then cut across traffic with 2 seconds to spare.

· In case you didn’t know, there is another headlight setting in your car. BRIGHT is not the ONLY option.

· For those kind souls who show others they are approaching by flickering between normal and bright when they are less than 5 feet away.. and…. STOP... I beg of you!! My eyes will be forever grateful.

But since I live in a perfect place where none of the above happens, I won’t even have to publish the post …

LUCKY ME!

My Sister :)

2009-09-22T14:59:00.004+10:00

From a young age, my sister was better at dealing with pain. I was the “wuss”. I remember that we would be promised ice cream before we were taken in for out shots. My sister would handle it like a pro and I guess the thought of having ice cream helped. For me, nothing they promised me was good enough for me to get shot. I would bolt from the room and would literally have my parents and docs chase me (or so I have been told!).

I even remember her rollerblading and skidding/ falling/ rolling down a tarred incline, and ripping a fair bit of her skin off in the process, only to get up back on those rollerblades the very next day. I on the other hand would probably have BURNT the rollerblades and claimed that WALKING is the cool thing to do.

While I was content spraining my back by slipping on steps, she has done it all from being chased my bee’s to being bitten by a dog and have an accident where a bus ran over her palm.

So when my sister told me that she wanted to go in for a natural birth, I was not surprised. I was extremely proud n chuffed that at least one of us has the strength.(Just so you know, when it’s my turn, it’s going to be “ALL THE PAIN MEDICATION MEDICALLY/ LEGALLY POSSIBLE PLEASE !!!!!”)

My sister was in labor for 15 hrs and they finally ended up doing a c-section. Tam-tam (my niece) was not ready to come out!

It was extremely difficult to be there and watch my little sister go through what she did. If it was difficult for me, I can’t even begin to imagine how it was for her. Now those who know me know that I am emotional. So for me to see her go through pain was not easy. I don’t think I have prayed so much as I did during those hours waiting for her in the room. I don’t think I have even cried that much is recent times as I did when I heard her cry. So I was actually relieved when they wheeled her into surgery.

While I was thrilled to see Tam-tam when they brought her out later, I think I began breathing normally and felt relieved only after I saw my sister. Believe it or not, the happiest moment for me on the 17th was when I went in to the recovery room and saw sister and she opened her eyes. I finally knew she was going to be ok. From then I knew that it would be alright!

At that point I couldn’t have been more proud of her or loved her more.

Isn't she lovely ....

2009-09-21T16:00:00.014+10:00

Isn't she lovely

Isn't she wonderful

Isn't she precious

made from love

I can't believe what God has done

To us he's given his precious one

Isn't she lovely...

Made from love

Let me introduce ....

2009-09-16T16:15:00.004+10:00

By the end of this week…. I would have met the person I fell in love with 9 months ago.

I have no idea what the person will look like… but I definitely have dreamt of it.

Since I definitely cannot jump up n down like this….

Let me describe the person to you.

The person will have:-

A “Love to be hugged and kissed” personality

A “Make your heart skip a beat while it does cartwheels” face

A pair of “Drown in me” eyes

A “Prefect little...Not too sharp... Not too blunt little” nose

“Yes! Aren’t they adorable” cheeks

“Soft n silky … will make anything look good” hair

“Adorn it with the best” ears

A “Make your heartache” cry

A “Make you do cartwheels” laugh

An “I got you wrapped around my finger” smile

An “Overflowing with God’s grace and love” heart

“I serve a wonderful God” knowledge

Doesn’t this person sound wonderful?

I definitely think this person is….

Homeward Bound

2009-05-20T18:49:00.003+10:00

I am heading home….. in exactly 17 days I will be home. You have no idea how that makes me feel.

Here is the deal, I am tired…. really tired, in every possible way. So the thought of being home with my mom n dad thrills me to bits. I can’t wait.

I can’t wait to be in a house where if I take more than 10 steps I don’t find myself in the balcony.

I can’t wait to have coffee mate in my coffee.

I can’t wait to curl up in the living room reading the paper while watching TV.

And most importantly I can't wait to spend time with my parents.

Here is my normal routine when I am home. I wake up late, just in time to see my mom return from the gym (sigh!!). I then plonk myself in front of the TV with the morning’s paper while mom gets herself a bowl of cornflakes (nice) or oats (yuck!).

After breakfast and a shower either I am off roaming with her or sitting on the couch chatting to my Gran. Pa soon comes for lunch and that is soon followed by mom n dad fighting over dessert. The fight they maintain is legit.

Then its time of the snooze followed by evening coffee n soon enough the program that should be banned “idea star singer” airs. Every evening we bicker about watching it, but we end up watching coz well…according to my mother “Coz I said so!! “

And then… dinner time….

Yes I know, ..very boring .. yet…. There is comfort in this familiarity.

Right now nothing sounds more appealing than this.

In the nick of time ...

2009-05-14T18:12:00.002+10:00

This last week has not been easy.

An accumulation of many many things and I really felt it would soon come crashing down and succeed in putting me back on square one. I am not joking when I said that I literally felt a stone in my heart. And it hurt! Praying about it eased the pain. For that moment. I even tried to figure out what I could do to make it better but, as always, I came up with nothing.

I soon fell in a pattern where all i asked for was the strength to get through each day. Today was no different. Today, I was listening to the online radio and this song by Josh Wilson began to play. It was aptly titled “Saviour Please” and below are the lyrics:

Savior, please take my hand
I work so hard, I live so fast
This life begins, and then it ends
And I do the best that I can, but I don't know how long I'll last

I try to be so tough
But I'm just not strong enough
I can't do this alone, God I need You to hold on to me
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love
Savior, please keep saving me

Savior, please help me stand
I fall so hard, I fade so fast
Will You begin right where I end
And be the God of all I am because You're all I have

Everything You are to me
Is everything I'll ever need
And I am learning to believe
That I don't have to prove a thing
'Cause You're the one who's saving me

I felt better. Maybe, I felt better because I heard this song just after I uttered a cry of desperation, just after i silently pleaded for some sign of hope. Maybe I felt better because I had unknowingly chosen to move forward. Maybe I felt better because I related to the words… I don’t know… but I felt better.

Has the problem been resolved? Far from it ….. But I have taken the first step .Just that knowledge gives me a perfect reason to smile.

And say “Thank you”

I can't wait.....

2009-05-04T17:44:00.005+10:00

I remember seeing the very first scan my sister had.

The baby was smaller than a grain of basmati… and yet very evident for all to see was its heart beat. From the very first moment of conception, all of the inherited features of this new person are already set – whether it’s a boy or girl, the color of the eyes, the color of the hair, the dimples of the cheeks and the cleft of the chin. He or she is smaller than a grain of sugar, but the instructions are present for all that this person will ever become. After seeing that I could not understand why some people say that the fetus is not human but a mass of tissue.

On Saturday, I watched as my sister got her third scan.

Amazed, moved, thrilled are just few of the words I could use to describe how I felt.

Sitting there all I could do was look in awe at this wonderful life growing inside her. Weighing all of 368grams the baby was faced down and all curled up. I got to see its spine, the feet, the hands, the nose and even the lips.

Blurry, but still perfect.

All I could think was here is this one person, whom I have never met, who right now is still expanding and contracting, is just starting to figure out that kicking is possible,who's leg is probably smaller than a toothpick and yet I love him or her like I never before.

I am waiting .....

Waiting to meet this person .....

Waiting to spoil the baby rotten .....

Waiting to love him silly.....

Waiting to watch him sleep.....

Waiting to tickle him till he screams for mercy.....

Waiting to teach him things which might make my brother in law want to disown me.....

Waiting to hold him and say a silent prayer for all my blessings.....

Waiting.....

Attack of the deadly Avacado !

2009-04-24T14:43:00.002+10:00

The other day I was in my favorite preschool class and as always chit chatting with the little tykes. Somehow the conversation turned to injuries. So while we were comparing different ways we hurt ourselves, one of the kids turned to me and we had this conversation.

“Ms Thomas….. Hmmm… you know… hmm…. my brother’s teacher…. Well … hmm … he got hurt.”

“Oh wow!! Really… was he hurt badly?? “

“Well…. Hmm… he was bitten by an avocado “

“A what???? “

“An avocado ...Ms Thomas “

(By this time…every other child was looking at me like I was daft...And nodding their heads and even telling me that they have seen the picture of the avocado”)

“Are you sure... That it was an avocado that bit him … coz I think an avocado is something you eat”

“Ewwwwwwwww Ms Thomas…. We can’t eat an avocado… It eats us ….. Come I will show you a picture of the avocado”

So we walk to the bookshelf….. And I was finally shown the deadly avocado…I finally saw it ... i started to shake .. fear or laughter ???...well you judge...

Staring back at me was the picture of ............

AN ANACONDA !!!

The suffering of his Broken Heart - Max Lucado

2009-03-09T19:39:00.002+10:00

I RECEIVED THIS IN MY MAIL TODAY. THE MOMENT I READ IT I FELT THAT I HAD TO SHARE IT. SO HERE YOU GO …

The Sufferings of His Broken Heart

- Max Lucado

Go with me for a moment to witness what was perhaps the foggiest night in history. The scene is very simple; you’ll recognize it quickly. A grove of twisted olive trees. Ground cluttered with large rocks. A low stone fence. A dark, dark night.

Now, look into the picture. Look closely through the shadowy foliage. See that person? See that solitary figure? What’s he doing? Flat on the ground. Face stained with dirt and tears. Fists pounding the hard earth. Eyes wide with a stupor of fear. Hair matted with salty sweat. Is that blood on his forehead?

That’s Jesus. Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane.

Maybe you’ve seen the classic portrait of Christ in the garden. Kneeling beside a big rock. Snow-white robe. Hands peacefully folded in prayer. A look of serenity on his face. Halo over his head. A spotlight from heaven illuminating his golden-brown hair.

Now, I’m no artist, but I can tell you one thing. The man who painted that picture didn’t use the gospel of Mark as a pattern. When Mark wrote about that painful night, he used phrases like these: “Horror anddismay came over him.” “My heart is ready to break with grief.” “He went a little forward and threw himself on the ground.”

Does this look like the picture of a saintly Jesus resting in the palm of God? Hardly. Mark used black paint to describe this scene. We see an agonizing, straining, and struggling Jesus. We see a “man of sorrows.” (Isaiah 53:3 NASB) We see a man struggling with fear, wrestling with commitments, and yearning for relief.

We see Jesus in the fog of a broken heart.

The writer of Hebrews would later pen, “During the days of Jesus’ life on earth, he offered up prayers and petitions with loud cries and tears to the one who could save him from death.” (Hebrews 5:7 NIV)

My, what a portrait! Jesus is in pain. Jesus is on the stage of fear. Jesus is cloaked, not in sainthood, but in humanity.

The next time the fog finds you, you might do well to remember Jesus in the garden. The next time you think that no one understands, reread the fourteenth chapter of Mark. The next time your self-pity convinces you that no one cares, pay a visit to Gethsemane. And the next time you wonder if God really perceives the pain that prevails on this dusty planet, listen to him pleading among the twisted trees.

The next time you are called to suffer, pay attention. It may be the closest you’ll ever get to God. Watch closely. It could very well be that the hand that extends itself to lead you out of the fog is a pierced one.

FAITH

2009-02-25T21:05:00.002+10:00

FAITH IS NOT DEMANDING WHAT WE WANT; IT IS TRUSTING GOD'S GOODNESS IN SPITE OF LIFE'S TRAGEDIES.

FAITH IS NOT DEMANDING WHAT WE WANT; ITS TRUSTING GODS GOODNESS IN SPITE OF LIFES TRAGEDIES

Friends, Strangers & Countrymen…. Lend me your ears…..

2009-01-12T19:36:00.005+10:00

I AM GOING TO BE AN AUNT.

An AUNT..Can you beat that … (actually maybe you can.. but I dont care !! )

My lil sis is expecting (or as folks back home would refer to “she is in the family way “...hahahaha). My sister does not have a blog … so I have decided that I will post the baby ticker on my blog.

I am so thrilled that I have already figured out what the baby is going to call me. "Tante" That’s German for aunt I have been told!!!

While I am still trying to picture my sister pregnant, I have had no problems slotting my brother in law into the daddy role (he has been practicing with me!!!). This is one journey I am so glad I have ring side seats for!!!

I found out on Friday and since then every time I think about it I tear up, and I can’t stop my heart from skipping an extra beat…. Thrilled doesn’t even start to define what I feel. But I def do know this. I feel blessed. I feel so blessed to be here during this time and I feel blessed that God is giving me someone to love. Most importantly, I am so grateful and thankful to God for giving them the precious baby. I know they will make awesome parents.

I can’t wait to have him/her in my life. Can’t wait to torture the parents with threats of tattoo and piercings and I can’t wait to spoil the lil one rotten.

I am already counting down the days …….

Kids say the most apt thing –

2009-01-08T15:22:00.001+10:00

Recently one of my students from Muscat, was in a play.

He was “King Richard” and during the play, he was supposed to get stabbed. Seeing him being stabbed, the girl standing behind him had to scream “ King Richard has been stabbed”.

Unfortunately, come the day of the final performance, the boy who was supposed to stab “King Richard” forgot to stab him. Despite nods and nudges from the other cast members, the “murderer” didn’t stab.

Finally “King Richard” decided that the show has to go one and fell dramatically to the ground screaming.

Seeing him collapse to the ground, the girl behind him screamed “King Richard is having a HEART ATTACK “

Sympathy Card

2008-12-09T14:28:00.003+10:00

One of the teachers at my school lost her sister yesterday.

So today, her grade 3 class was asked to make her a “sympathy card”.

Here are the wordings of one such card (verbatim):

“Dear Miss B, this is a astonishing new which is depressing. But it is a co-incidence. My ancestors was a King of India, and he did not die of old age but of a heart attack. I am sorry”

It is well ....

2008-11-18T15:17:00.004+10:00

Horatio Sapafford was a 43yr old lawyer who lived in Chicago with his wife Anna and his 5 children.
In 1871, his only son died.
Few months later, the Great Chicago fire of 1871, consumed his real estate investments and he lost his entire life savings.
2 years later, Sapafford and his entire family decided to go on a holiday to Europe. However last minute business delayed Sapafford. He sent his wife and 4 daughters on the SS Ville Du Havre, promising to follow in a few days time.
The ship was struck by an iron sailing vessel and it sank in q2 minutes. 226 people were killed.
When the survivors landed in Europe, Anna Sapafford cabled her husband “Saved alone, what shall I do? “
He immediately left Chicago to go bring his wife home.
In the midst of his sorrow, when sailing near the place his daughters drowned, he wrote ….

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way,
When sorrows like sea billows roll;
Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say,

It is well, it is well, with my soul.
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, with my soul,
It is well, it is well, with my soul.

Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come,
Let this blessed assurance control,
That Christ has regarded my helpless estate,
And hath shed His own blood for my soul.

My sin, oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!
My sin, not in part but the whole,
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more,
Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!

And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,
Even so, it is well with my soul.

Why am I writing this?

Every day I stumble.
Every day I falter.
Some days I question. Even when I know I should not.
I don’t ever doubt him being there. Even then, I tend to double check…
After I heard this song in church on Friday, it stuck with me. I googled it, and that’s when I read the story behind this song. It got me thinking, if he could have such undying faith at one of the worst moments in his life …why can’t I?
That is the faith I seek.
The never ending, never shaking belief that no matter what he will be there and no matter what he will guide me through.

Thank you !

2008-11-14T19:38:00.002+10:00

It’s been a few months since I moved to Chennai. And while I do love it here, it’s not been easy. Being in a city where you don’t know many people and to have a new job tends to get overwhelming.
Life+job +new place+ I, more or less seem to have settled into a pace but there are always times that make me feel absolutely lost. I feel so selfish when I say this (coz I know I am so very blessed), but that’s being honest.
And today was one such day…. I think I had reached my saturation level and was close to tears…
I then took up the Daily Bread for my morning prayer…. And this is what I read

Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side;
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain;
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change He faithfully will remain.

He answered every single cry and prayer of mine ….
I am all set

Bring on the world

NO……. NOT ME!

2008-11-07T15:30:00.004+10:00

Disclaimer: This is NOT a spin off on “Not me Mondays”. The story below DID NOT happen to me. It’s purely fictional and any resemblance to actual situation is purely INTENTIONAL.

I DID NOT leave my school in Friday the 24th of October at 3pm for a 6pm flight to Muscat in pouring rain.
I DID NOT find myself stuck in traffic just 1 km from where I work at 4 pm.
I DID NOT have murderous thoughts towards those blocking traffic.
I DID NOT pray.
I DID NOT get stuck on a bridge at 5 pm with 8 kms left to go to the Airport.
I DID NOT panic and call my sister.
I DID NOT worry about missing my flight.
I DID NOT pray.
I DID NOT get out of the cab at 5 pm and run towards the station with my duffle bag on my shoulder.
I DID NOT find the path leading up to the station flooded.
I DID NOT wade through it to go, jump a queue and get a ticket.
I DID NOT pray.
I DID NOT get out at the station that is across from the airport and find the walkway flooded.
I DID NOT wade through “questionable” water.
I DID NOT walk/ run in the rain to the check in terminal.
I DID NOT think that I would have missed my 6 pm flight.
I DID NOT fly Indian Airlines
I DID NOT check in to find out that the flight was delayed for 1 hr.
I DID NOT pray and thank him for getting me there safe.
I DID NOT finally board a flight that, instead of going to Muscat via Calicut, flew to Trivandrum, then to Calicut and finally Muscat.
I DID NOT feel sick throughout.
I DID NOT get upgraded to first class for the final leg of my journey.
I DID NOT pass out only to wake up just before we landed in Muscat.
I DID NOT fall sick till the following Saturday and DID NOT need any medication.
I DID NOT have my folks take care of me and supply me with endless meals of curd rice and red fish curry.
I DID NOT fly Indian Airlines for my return journey.
I DID NOT find my return flight cancelled.
I DID NOT silently / loudly curse.
I DID NOT have to fly via Bombay / Mumbai.
I DID NOT wander 2 hours trying to find an Indian Airlines official to help me get my boarding pass.
I DID NOT finally board the flight at 7 to only sit on the tarmac till 8am.
I DID NOT fall asleep and miss take off.
I DID NOT miss another day of school.
I DID NOT vow to never to fly Indian Airlines again.

I DID NOT thank GOD for getting me home safe.

Kid's say the most "perfect" thing !!

2008-10-24T18:22:00.002+10:00

(This conversation took place while I was walking (in line) with Ms Dina’s KG class)

Student 1(girl): How do you know us?
Me: Well I work here and I asked for the "BESTEST" KG class and everyone told me it was you guys. So I came to meet you all.
Student 2(boy): so you are a teacher?
Me: Yes !
Student 2: but you can’t be a teacher.
Me: why not???
Student 2: Because… you are SLIM!!
Me: (in my mind) I LOVE YOU!

Kids say the darnest thing !!

2008-10-21T18:58:00.005+10:00

I just got back from a pre K class.

Each time I go to that class I come back smiling

This is the conversation between the student and the teacher (during playtime)

Student L: “xkoos me… xkoos me ... xkoos me Miss T”

Teacher: “Yes L, what is it ?”

Student L: “can I please put this hat on”

(Gives the teacher a Knights Helmet)

Teacher: “sure you can. Wow... how smart…. Look …. You are a Knight”

(Student looks funnily at the teacher ….thinks…..)

Student L: “No, Miss T, My name is L “(point's to himself)

(point's to the window)" and its day ... not night “

and proceeds to walk off.

No prizes for guessing who the teacher is !!!

Carry on luggage :)

2008-10-21T18:37:00.003+10:00

In case I haven’t already told you … I AM GOING HOME!! Yay!!

10 days of home food and TV and sleep. “Nice “I hear you say…. I agree!!

Once the decision was made to go back home, I began getting items to add to my list to take back. These items DONOT come all together but in e-mails strewn over the past 2 months. Which, I should say, is fine by me?

So this got me thinking of the various times we have gone back home and of the weird (according to the kids and husband) stuff we had to carry back.

We carried back chairs. Yes! You heard me right CHAIRS. These were chairs from Gujarat! These are chairs we CANNOT sit on. If you lean against it, they break and it’s too small for an adult to even contemplate sitting on it. As we were passing through the security check, the policeman there couldn’t help but ask me … “Don’t you have chairs in Muscat?”Answer:”sheepish grin”

We carried back a cradle. This apparently was the cradle Amma slept in. She had it cleaned, painted and polished. Not because there was going to be an addition to the family, but because in our house (according to Amma dearest) we lacked a cute table!! (REALLY???). With a glass slab on top, this “crable” (cradle + table; for the slow ones) sits in our living room.

We carried back a 2-3ft lamp (a.k.a”vellaku”) coz well the corridor lacked “something”
I am sure that we carried heaps more interesting stuff. I guess in the end it was definitely worth it coz we do have a lovely house with chairs we can’t sit in and lamps we don’t light!
I thought I better leave you with my current “take back to Muscat” list:
5 kgs Kerala Rice
2 kgs Idli Rice
½ kg Jangri
½ kg Ladoo
1 kg Muruku (it was ½ kg till Amma said “make it 1 so all in all you will have about 9 kgs worth of food to carry”)

And there is still 3 days remaining before I travel.

I KNOW, I HAVE LEARNT, I AM LEARNING, I BELIEVE…….

2008-10-20T19:59:00.005+10:00

I believe that God answers all prayers… it’s just not the answer WE want.
I know that there is a God up there who looks after me.
I have learnt that there is only 1 God.
I am learning that prayer is a skill that needs to be learnt.
I believe that there is a plan laid out for me. I just might not be seeing it.
I know that it is possible to be in a crowd and still lonely.
I have learnt that it is possible to miss someone I haven’t even met.
I am learning to be patient and wait.
I believe that sooner or later I will master the art of cooking the perfect steak.
I know that I get upset if my students don’t work well.
I have learnt that just 1 hug from my students has me feeling like a million bucks.
I am learning that I need to be a good example.
I believe that people still judge a book by its cover.
I know that I can’t sing despite the desperate hope that I can.
I have learnt that I am a good listener.
I am learning to be a better listener.
I believe that people think I am weak because I cry easily.
I know that I will cry the next time I see Bambi.
I have learnt that there are some who can STILL reduce me to tears.
I am learning that I have so much more to learn.

No Scarifice

2008-10-20T15:05:00.005+10:00

This song has in the recent times become my favourite. I seem to be humming it ever so often even caught myself singing it yesterday (if you can call it singing).
It’s an amazing song by Jason Upton and well it says it all. For me this is what I need to do. Not give parts to Him, but give ALL.

No Sacrifice

To you I give my life, not just the parts I want to

To you I sacrifice these dreams that I hold on to

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

This is no sacrifice

Here's my life

To you I give the gifts

Your love has given me

How can I hoard the treasures that you've designed for free?

Because

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

This is no sacrifice

Here's my life

To you I give my future

As long as it may last

To you I give my present

To you I give my past

Because

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

Your thoughts are higher than mine

Your words are deeper than mine

Your love is stronger than mine

This is no sacrifice

Here's my life

TAGGING

2008-10-15T12:55:00.007+10:00

1. If your lover betrayed you, what would your reaction be?

I would feel that life as I know it has come to an end and think that I would never recover from it!

2. If you can have a dream come true, what would it be?

God has already made few of my dreams possible and is working on the rest. The remaining would be to be blessed with a good family and a never doubting faith.

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?

Auto drivers and those that hurt kids. Oh! and those that bug me ( hint !! hint !! )

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

Hmm I would give 1 million to my folks n sister n brother. Splurge 1 million on a trip for the family. Buy. Build a nice house and INVEST the rest (YES !!! I am boring and I love boring things).

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?

Err not rite now coz my best friends' a girl. But YES I definitely look fwd to it.

6. Which is more blessed: loving someone or being loved by someone?

Loving someone. I know I am loved.

7. How long would you wait for someone you loved?

Long enough.

8. If the person you secretly like is attached, what will you do?

Migrate to a different hemisphere.

9. If you could root for one social cause, what would it be?

Child Abuse.

10. What takes you down the fastest?

Hurtful comments.

11. Where do you see yourself in 10 years time?

At a family reunion about to head out for a trip with my whole family.

12. What’s your fear?

Snakes

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

Funny, extremely loving, caring, scatterbrained, talkative, ODC philic, super mom in the making.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married and poor?

Neither. Married & rich.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Look for the band to tie my hair

16. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously who will you pick?

NEVER going to happen. Falling in love and maintaining with 1 is difficult enough.

17. Would you give all in a relationship?

sure I would.

18. Would you forgive and forget someone no matter how horrible a thing he has done?

Forgive- not immediately but in time.
Forget- No! just so that I wont make the same mistake again

19. Do you prefer being single or in a relationship?

if you knew me, you would know.

20. List of 6 people to tag:

none… all that I would have tagged , have already been tagged !! (shaking fist wildly at scatterbrain !!! )

Thanks Scatterbrain :)

My Family- Part II

2008-10-08T17:18:00.009+10:00

This is a continuation of my prev blog

A much talked about shopping trip my parents took. It had been pouring in Muscat and my parents decided that they needed to go shopping. They left my sister and me in the house telling us to “study “. Perfectly normal I hear you say, well, read on.
When they got back, they rang the doorbell but no response. So my dad pounded on the door, still no response. Our folks began calling our names loudly, if you know our parents you know how loud they can get, no response. While all this was going on, they turned out the electricity thinking might have been a gas leak and for all you know we might be lying unconscious in the house. They went to our downstairs neighbor (we were living on the first floor) and called the house. No response. Appa then got a “ladder “from the neighbors’ house, put it against the wall and climbed up onto our balcony. Luckily the balcony door was left open.
Guess what my dad found when he walked in.
Both my sister and I were fast asleep, on the couches, in the living room, very much unaware of the panic we had just caused. And just so you know how “passed out “ we were, the door that they pounded on, was right next to the living room and the phone they had rung on, was between the two couches we were sleeping on.
All I can say is, “I am glad I lived to tell the tale!”

All of us, desperately, hoping that India would win, the cricket match it was playing that day, as Appa would take us out for dinner IF they won.

Amma, used to message every other day when I was working at Pondy. She would ask me to get online and when I used to tell her I was busy, she would ask me to let her know the time etc etc. Now adays, I have computer in front of me for most of the day. Till date, I am yet to receive a message asking me to get on chat !!

Playing dumb charades with my folks especially Appa. If ever you want to watch a game that will reduce you to tears (only because you are laughing so much) let me know. I shall invite you to our next family games night. Here’s a hint: ask him to mime “Coma”.

The trips we took as a family when we used to come down from Muscat for the summer holidays. Having family scattered all over Kerala meant 2 things. My dad would have to drive all over and it also meant endless hours in the back of a Maruti Van. Those who have had that experience can sympathize with me. As children both my sister and I decided that we would grow up, get our license and take our parents around with THEM in the back seat. We grew up, we got our license and Appa sold the van … Smart man !!

As kids, when we had guest, we would end up sleeping on our parents’ bedroom floor. One night we discovered that we had water guns and decided to squirt our folks with it while pretending to sleep. We THOUGHT it would surprise them and Appa/ Amma would ask “water? Where is this water coming from?” (Silly kids!!) What we didn’t consider was the excellent hearing power Amma possess. Before we knew it, we were bombarded by pillows from either side and had Appa and Amma standing over us and well…. Need I say more???

My Family - Part 1

2008-10-08T15:12:00.008+10:00

While going through my blogs I realized that I haven’t written much about my family.

So here goes….. These are small instances which I will always remember (some maybe not that small!!)

My Amma’s standard answer to us asking “Why” (after she has said “No”) “because I said so”

My dad deciding at 10 at night that it will be a good night for an ice cream, so piling us into the car ,pajamas and all and driving to Baskin Robbins!

My dad driving us 100kms to see a Malayalam movie and returning at 1 am on a school night.

Us kids locking our folks out of the house and allowing them back in after having them sing a song and write their names in the air with their butts !! It will help you all to know that my Amma’s and Appa’s names’ consists of I, few O’s and few S’s. We also expected them to put a full stop after their name J

My brother (the pain that he is) when he was small was the cutest lil butter ball ever. And when you asked him something and he didn’t know he would respond by saying “I na na “(I don’t know!!)

My sister trying to sing the song of an advert when she was small. “Vicador washy washy.. e washy e wishy.. “ (Videocon washing machine… it washes it rinses ) & “washy washy nema, washy washy nema (washing powder nirma , washing powder nirma )- for someone who didn’t like to take baths it’s amazing the songs she chose !

A Thought !

2008-09-30T13:02:00.004+10:00

The newspaper for the last few days has been filled with stories of various blasts and about the injuries and deaths that followed.
In one of those articles, someone had asked whether “people had forgotten the art of caring, forgotten the need to help“
I was thinking about that when the article that detailed out the recent blast in Delhi caught my eye.
This is what happened.
Two guys in a moped drove past a busy area and what looked like a package dropped from their bike while they sped off. A 9 yr old boy, seeing the package drop went forward to pick it up and return it to help. That package was the bomb. When the boy lifted it, it blew up, severing his head from the rest of the body. The boy was thrown in the air and fell several feet away.
Needless to say that 9 yr olds life came to an abrupt ending.
Now you tell me, if getting blown up is the end result of trying to help someone what would anyone WANT to help? If getting killed is the result of caring enough to do the right thing, why would anyone do it?
I still believe that the art of caring or wanting to help is not dead.

But sometimes it’s hard !!

The blog says it all ...

2008-09-22T20:17:00.007+10:00

I am bored..so thought i might as well write this blog in webdings.... for a change .... ok todays topic.... BLOG TEMPLATE ..... I get bored of my blog's template every other day.. but then again i dont think it really matters coz no one really reads it !!
but here is the thing .. have you noticed how boring the page templates are in blogspot ??? hey mr blogspot man.... new templates pls !!
oops... does this mean i will be barred from havin an account ?????
well as you can see.. i am bored... actually i am more tired that bored...so i am TIRED bored !!
(HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP)

Translation :
I am bored..so thought i might as well write this blog in webdings.... for a change .... ok todays topic.... BLOG TEMPLATE ..... I get bored of my blog's template every other day.. but then again i dont think it really matters coz no one really reads it !!
but here is the thing .. have you noticed how boring the page templates are in blogspot ??? hey mr blogspot man.... new templates pls !!
oops... does this mean i will be barred from havin an account ?????
well as you can see.. i am bored... actually i am more tired that bored...so i am TIRED bored !!
(HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP)

Ray of hope

2008-09-18T20:57:00.005+10:00

There are weeks where things go to plan and then there are weeks that have you looking up at Him and silently mouthing “ ARE YOU KIDDING ME ?? “

Well the end of last week and early this week was one of the “are you kidding me” weeks!! So when I realized that I had forgotten to pay my electricity bill (failure to do so will result in then shutting off your main switch!!) it was more or less like the straw that broke the camel’s back. So there I was on a Tuesday feverishly praying that things will soon work out. I remember praying” please give a sign that it’s going to be ok. Please let me know that, no matter what, as you have done always, you will take care of me”. In short I asked for one “ray of hope”, to indicate that things aren’t always as bleak as they seem. Please don’t take this as my lack of belief but I am only human. And well that day, I faltered.

I decided on Tuesday night that I would rock up early to the electricity board, and be among the first in line, pay my bill and get to work. On reaching there I happen to strike up conversation with a woman and man, both of whom were there to pay the bill early so that they could get back to work. While waiting at the billing counter, we began talking. When I say “billing counter” what I actually mean is a small dingy meshed window, beyond which it is too dark to see, and through which you hand over your card and cash and like magic a random hand comes and takes the money and thrusts the receipt back to you. During our conversation, I mentioned that I was a teacher (well I really didn’t think telling them I was a speech and language pathologist would prove useful). The woman told me that she worked as a domestic help and the man told me that he ran a milk booth. The man then mentioned that though the sign says that the billing counter indicates that it would open at 830am, there is no guarantee and mostly it opens anywhere between 9 and 10am.

On hearing this, my already stressed out brain went into over drive and I began to panic. So I decided (very quietly) that I might as well take ½ day off to get this done. I also began practicing the conversation I will have to have with my boss in my mind. No sooner had I practiced it for the third time in a row, the man looked at me and said “Madam, I know this will make you late for work. Why don’t you give me your card and the money and I will pay your bill for you and I will meet you at a place you tell me to in the evening and give you back your card”.

Before I go on any further let me just tell you all this. I have lived in Chennai for the past 4 month. Till date I am yet to meet a stranger who was willing to help. I have to fight with auto drivers everyday for a fair ride and I have had people at the counter stare at me like I am mad when I say “thank you” and I have had palm readers curse me when I told them I didn’t want my palm read and beggars (very healthy ones I might add) scream at me when I don’t give then any cash. So you can imagine my surprise when I was offered the help. The offer lead to a discussion between the “devil” and “angel” that resides in my head. (I state that this conversation took place only because I was so stressed out) The conversation went something like this:
“Angel”: “oh wow...what a nice offer “
“Devil “: “there is nothing nice about it… I am sure he wants something ... I know, he will disappear with your cash”
Angel”: “no way, after all its 195 Rs… what good would that do? “
“Devil”: “fine… do what you want… but I will be waiting to say ... I told you so!! “

So, I thanked the man profusely, took out Rs 250 and my card and handed it to him. He opens the card and without any hesitation, hands back the 50 Rs. I again hand it back to him, telling him to please take it for all the trouble he is going through for me. He once again hands back the cash and tells me “My God, won’t allow it.” He continued by saying “I however have only 1 request. If at any time you are free, can you please give some tuition to my children so that one day they can end up being like you”. Words failed me and all I could do was nod.

I had found my “ray of hope”.

I left the electricity board with the biggest smile on my face and with my faith in a lot of things, restored.

To add to the joy, guess who was waiting for me at the predetermined location with his daughter, carrying the card, the receipt and change of Rs5.

THANK YOU GOD! YOU ARE AMAZING!!

ABC's of ME

2008-08-18T16:44:00.008+10:00

A-Available: For?

B-Best friend: Priya

C-Cake or Pie? : Cake

D-Drink of choice: H2O on the rocks!

E-Essential thing used every day: Toothpaste

F-Favorite color: Black ( Keeps on changing though ! )

G-Gummi bears or worms: Bears coz worms are too soft

H-Hometown: Thiruvella

I-Indulgence: Rarely !!!

J-January or February: Neither

K-Kids and names: None ( Dhruv .. when I do have one ! )

L-Life is incomplete without: My family

M-Marriage date: TBA

N-Number of siblings: 2 but loads n loads of cousins!!

O-Oranges or apples: Both

P-Phobias: Snakes

Q-Quote: I would rather walk with God in the dark than go alone in the light.

R-Reason to smile: My life rite now

S-Season: Winter

U-Unknown fact about me: Now that would take the mystery factor out of me rite

V-Vegetable you do not like: Bitter gourd

W-Worst habit: Need everything in order

X-rays you have had: 6 or 7 if not more

Y-Your favourite food: Indian / perfectly cooked steak

Z-Zodiac: Sagittarian

My list :)

2008-08-13T20:17:00.002+10:00

I seem to have gotten into this habit where I pop in out of the blue, write something and disappear. While I am trying to change the habit…. It’s not very easy.
The past few months seem to have flown past. Within the past 3 months, we managed to throw Appa a surprise 60th b’day party, get a new apartment, shift in without much chaos and join work.
So here’s a list of things I have learnt:
1)You can actually pull of a surprise and not have that grin leave your face for days!!
2)Hunting for new apartments in Chennai is a traumatic experience. What some people deem good is SCARY!
3)It’s impossible to get anything delivered on time
4)Auto people have really been put on this earth to teach you patience and as part of the detox program for cannibalism.
5)Neighbours really have a way of figuring out information you don’t think you have given.
6)When you are staying alone, the silence is scary
7)I spend up spending most of my time in the apartment sleeping
8)Cooking for 1 still is a pain
9)Even after 2 weeks, I still get lost in the school
10)Kids have a way of making you feel smart and stupid at the same time
11)Weekends have a whole new meaning when you are at school from 7:30 to 4
12)You finally see a purpose in all that you have been through and in all that brought you here.
See you soon …. Hopefully !!

Life since July 2007

2008-06-15T21:51:00.002+10:00

Been almost a year since I last wrote. A lot has happened in that time. So let me try and recap the major events.
I left Australia a place that’s been my foster home for the past 4 years. Tears were shed not because I would miss the place but for a few I left behind there who will forever hold a special place in my heat. It was a nice place and I definitely learnt a lot but it was time to move on. It was very clear to me that, that phase of my life was over.
I landed a few days before my sister’s wedding. And amongst all the chaos I actually turned 30. The wedding went off really well. There were a few tears and whole lot of smiles (I got pics to prove it!! ). Had to prance around in a sari and look all composed despite the heat and the fact that I was coming down with the flu. I loved every moment of it.
We went to the wedding as a family of 5 and came back as a family of 6. Got myself a brother in law (as if a brother wasn’t trouble enough!!). To add to the delight, the pain ( as I lovingly call him) has won over everyone in the family and I swear my father thinks the sun rises and sets with him. My mother thinks he is a “paavam” and reminds me constantly I shouldn’t bully him. Come on .. me .. and a bully ..NEVER ! As you can see my troubles are just beginning.
I then found myself in Pondicherry. I was working in a medical college at the department of ENT. Beautiful place Pondy, small and sometimes too small. I had enough work to keep me busy till March. After which the audiometer (instrument used to check hearing) broke down and it’s still being fixed. I took some getting used to being in a place like Pondy and esp. the college. I was suddenly the new thing and everyone seemed to care what I was doing, what I was wearing and the top most question on everyone’s mind was “ does she have a guy ??” …. Needless to say, answers to all of the above questions were not provided much to their disappointment. After being in a place where everyone left you alone to do your work, it was scary to suddenly be in a place where you every move was observed. Believe it or not there was actually a discussion on why I wore my duppatta over my left shoulder and NOT pinned over both shoulders like others did. Initially I was pissed off and irritated but with time I would actually be curious to see what the next topic of discussion was.
But I must admit being there in Pondy def let me get used to life in India at a slow pace and in my own time. I made some really nice friends in time and I soon got the hang of life there. I got to know people and grew to love them. Especially one who smiled the prettiest smile and no matter what the heartache or worry found time to be there and encourage. After seeing her I learnt that no matter what, you need to move on, strive forward and in time, in Gods time he will give you what is right for you. Thank you for that.
Soon after I was offered a job in Chennai. To work at the International American School here and be a full time speech pathologist. So after 5 months of working in Pondy, I found myself packing up and heading to Chennai. I landed here yesterday evening.
Well here I am, in a new place, starting fresh and desperately hoping that this will turn out fine. I really have no idea what tomorrow brings and what’s in store. And occasionally it scares the living daylights out of me. But at the same time I know it’s going be alright.
It’s a new phase, a new journey, a new story with new cast members with the hope that this phase, this story will have a happy ending.

Something to consider ......

2007-07-23T22:46:00.000+10:00

I am guessing with this being my first blog in a long long time .. i shud actually come up with something more philosophical or spew words of wisdom..... i have been meaning to write for ages but nothing really prompted me to sit up n write ...well that was until i heard this quote ... so now this already over worked brain of mine is in over drive !!!

I heard this quote while watching Criminal Minds ( good show !! ).... and I googled it to get the complete quote....

It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone.

Rose Kennedy

US wife of Joseph Patrick Kennedy Sr. (1890 - 1995)

Is this true ? dont we really ever recover from the past ? do we still unknowingly hold on to the past ? if this is true do we really give anything / anyone a fresh start or do we still judge situations and people based on how it was in the past ? .....

WHAT DO YOU THINK ?

To write or not to write … that is NOT the question!!!

2006-09-19T12:38:00.000+10:00

Now don’t get me wrong... I love to write... Just ask anyone… especially those whom I mail … and let me tell you... These letters aren’t short... Noooooo… they r long...And given a chance they would be longer.

You ask me to write a scrap … I am there...With bells on and a pen in my hand ready to go.

You ask me to write something on your behalf... I am there...all set to let those words have their say.

You ask me to write my PhD ……and I go BLANK!!!!

I am not joking …. For the past 4 weeks I have been coming into the University at about 9 in the morning. Even on weekends mind you! and I am here till about 7 in the evening.( I have even given up MASH !!!). A very busy schedule I hear you say…. Darn right you are!!!!

Let me tell you what this busy schedule is made up of. Endless cups of coffee(oh no green tea now a days!!), a little bit of writing here and there and constantly staring at the computer screen in the desperate hope that my PhD will somehow, by some miracle start to write itself!!!! I am still waiting. In the mean time the page I began this morning is still blank while in between contemplating what to write, I have managed to send out 5 letters, write about 5 scraps on Orkut and even write out a new blog!!

So yeah….. What do I do??

I am sure I will be told soon enough by few that its called LAZINESS. True but what IF it’s not that? What IF it’s the work of some unseen force??? WHAT IF???

So to conclude…. No… I am not lazy … it’s an unseen force that’s preventing me from doing my PhD.

Therefore... after taking all matters into consderation , I have decided to soldier on (very bravely) and go find a way to over power that force.

But before that, let me just go very quickly and refill my cup of green tea and I shall be on my way …….eventually !!!!!! :)

What next ?

2006-09-08T14:22:00.000+10:00

For a very long time... I have been confronted by people asking me the question “what next ? “ so after my 12th it was a degree … after that it was a masters degree... and after that a doctorate... and when I began my PhD my answer used to be “ to complete n get through this without loss of life.. mine or anyone else’s … and without the loss of sanity.” While I am sure there has been no loss of life (till date) the question of loss of sanity is still up for grabs!!!
So yesterday I happened to ask myself the same question, “what next?” and while the answer of “getting a job” seemed to pop up, somewhere inside of me this voice seemed to say “ what about marriage ? What about settling down? “
And at the moment, ladies and gentleman I FREAKED OUT!!
Now before you all jump to conclusions … I DON’T think marriage is over rated, I think every person needs someone to spend the rest of their life with and ever since I can remember I have always wanted to be married with kids. 2 kids. I even have tentative names for them.
So now if your wondering why I freaked out, I don’t know.
Sometimes I feel that marriage, at the times of our parents was a whole lot different that now. Not any easier by definitely different from my point of view. For starters you were in it for the long haul. You couldn’t call it quits. Divorce was unheard of unless it was the direst situation. So it was such that people simply tried harder then. Where as now a day’s you squeeze the toothpaste out of the tube differently and that’s it you’re out. It’s doomsday in the making.
I believe that most of this generation have come to a stage where they take it for granted. And their belief is if this doesn’t work out there is always something else. And that I believe is the quicksand!
Love marriages and arranged marriages both have their ups and downs. I know people who have had a love marriage, and their complaint is he/she is not the same as before. For those who have had an arranged marriage he/she just doesn’t get me or try n understand me. And maybe it is true but what one lacks here (which was very much present in older times) is the need to make it work despite all odds. Maybe in earlier times they made it work because the options available to them were not what we have these days but at least they tried.
I haven’t been married… but I know it’s tough. It’s a compromise and it’s an understanding that probably today one must compromise more than the other and the understanding that, that compromise won’t be held against the other person. I believe that marriage is such a relationship where respect is mutual, dependence is mutual, independence is equal and honesty and trust crucial.
I have seen people hurt the ones they claim to love , I have seen people take the ones they love for granted and I have seen people walk away from a relationship because its too hard for them to try and make it work.
I don’t want that …
And maybe that’s why I freaked out!

R.I.P Steve Irwin

2006-09-07T15:35:00.000+10:00

I am currently on the high of having opened up this blog site ( is that whats its called !! ) so thought i might as well continue writing !! i guess i might as well write about whats going on here currently .... Steve Irwin ... now who would have seen that coming ? not me for one !! When Nandita called n told me the news I was so so so sure she was joking .. coz even then no TV Channels were showing it as breaking news ... but 30 mins after that it began pouring in ... imagine..steve irwin ...dead.. killled that too by a Stingray !!
heck...ppl like him are not supposed to die .. no i mean it ..they are not .. they r supposed to continue being larger than life images ... and they r supposed to live for ever ...
let me be honest though... in the very beginning ... i really didnt think that highly of him ... i found him to be too loud and boistrous for my liking ... every time i saw him on tele i wud say " surelyyyyyyyy you can talk softly !! " .... then things changed. I happened to go to Australia Zoo .. for the second time mind you. And that was during the school holidays !! So Bindi was doing a show... Bindi and the Crocmen... it was Steve's daughter with 4 boyzone wannabes.. singing n dancing for about 30 mins ... and who should be there but Steve himself ..with Terri .. Bob Bob .. and i think even his manager was there ... he sang and danced through the whole 30 mins from the stands with his daughter... he never sat still ... neither did Terri... and it was at that point the coin dropped for me . the love that i saw in his eyes for his lil one ...the pride i saw in him was something i had never seen before !! at one point he got up with bob bob n danced too .. and the look of pure awe..love.. admiration i saw in bindi's eyes... i knew wasnt one that happened suddenly.... every other stanza she wud look at her dad n mom .. they wud cheer n smile n clap.. and she wud bloom !!!! yes sitting through 30 mins of a 8 yr old girl singing about animal with 4 men who clearly shudnt be there ... was a bit too much to take it ( and i remember even mentionning it to my friends!! ).. but it was was worth it coz i finally got to see what others were talking about...about what it was about Steve Irwin that made him unique...
Shortly after that i read an article of him n his family ... of how he is a morning person n how he does all the cooking ..and the only thing that puts him into a panic mode was changing Bob's diapers !!! ( ahaha he can fight with crocs but cant change a diaper.... it was comforting to know that even Steve Irwin had issues with changing diapers !! ) .. and there was so much that Terri told of him as an individual that made me actually believe in everything he said or did ..and made me see him differently !!!
Now hes gone ... and i have to ask .. where is the justice in all this ..people who kill , hurt , destroy are actually walking this planet and one that does good has been taken away . its not fair is it ? rite now theres this girl.. who has lost her hero... she herself had sais a few years ago , aged 4 or 5 that , " i take after my dad " ... is it fair to her ? or fair to bob who is only 3 .. might not even grasp the concept of death .... but still hes lost a father ....
and you know whats the worst of it all .. individuals like Germaine Greer.... surelyyyyyyy one knows never to speak poorly of the dead .... i am sure there are many out there who might have their own opinions about Steve Irwin.... but surely to stand up and openly criticize such and individual. If he was harming there animals like she claimed he was.. then y was he called a conservationist ???? she said steve irwin was an embaressemennt to the australian people... well i guess i am in good authority to say that ..Germaine Greer is an embaressment to the HUMAN RACE !!!
well at the end of the day .... hes gone ... but atleast he died doing what he loved... right now that will not be of any comfort to his family ... but in time i guess time will heal all wounds... and after all look at his legacy.. look what he has left behind .... a family thats loved by the world .... 2 children who are soon gonna change the way this world views animals and conservation .. and a woman who will support them throughout their life !! he definitely lived a short life..44 is not old !!... but hell he packed a whole lot of love n lives into those 44 yrs !!!
R.I.P Steve.....

My First Ever Blog

2006-09-07T15:15:00.000+10:00

I have heard that people have been doing this for ages.... as always i seem to have taken my own sweet time to come about to doing this. But then again ..... i really dont have an interesting life to write about ... how much of excitement can happen between getting up .. going to uni..going to the gym ..coming back.. cooking ..eating and sleeping ??? see what did i tell u !!

Australia i must admit has treated me well ... except for the weather of course !! been here close to 4 yrs.. made some really gud friends ... discovered that i can cook ... tried my hand at dancing .. and my friends can vouch for the fact that though i didnt set the stage abalze with mr talent .. i definitely didnt kill anyones !!! but then again i think awards need to be handed to Nandita n Reena for attempting the impossible n making it possible....
well if i write everything out today itself ... what will i write about tomorrow ???? or maybe much much later ???
Ciao !